Brexit! Bananas! Baked Beans! Idiots!

Proudly Taking Back Control of Our Bananas!

Strong and Stable Idiots!

Martin Gordon releases ‘Idiots’ – a hymn to Brexit, a manly and not-at-all-foreign celebration of the glorious and imminent restoration of British control over the curvature of our proudly-British bananas.

‘Idiots’ is an ode of praise to those brave men (and woman) who have selflessly abandoned all vestiges of common sense in order to carry out the express wishes of proudly-British idiots who courageously determined that Belgians were attempting to impose phlegm-quotas by the back door. Take that, Walloons!

What the UK needs right now is a strong and stable leader who can close the strong and stable door after the strong and stable horse has left, thus strongly (and also stably) preventing any other strong (or indeed stable) horses from also leaving. That would never do, plus they are probably foreign, at least their food smells terrible, or so I heard. All those oats…

In June, British idiots (and any others who happen to be knocking around the place) will have their last chance to join Trump in the rubbish bin of history or to regain control over their shining future as an imperial power by electing a pre-programmed Dalek incapable of social intercourse.

‘Idiots’ proudly celebrates the UK’s legendary act of self-immolation! ‘Idiots’ proudly acknowledges the continuation of a staunch history of British idiocy! Two cheers for British idiots! They are the best idiots in the whole world!


Can you read? Oh, good! Here are the idiotic lyrics, and you are just the kind of person we will need when we invade Spain. But don’t bring that embarrassing pink passport, whatever you do.

Download Idiotsfrom all regular (but foreign) outlets. Anyway my dad’s a policeman. And I bet he’s bigger than your dad. Yes but no I bet he is.

Soon to come: remixes featuring Nigel Farrago, Marine La Penis-Envie, Wild-Eyed Gertie, Frankly Petrified, Mother Teresa, Donaldskovitch Wigovski and other idiots.

Idiots is already attracting abuse and physically-impossible exhortations from the simple-minded, geriatric and former bass-mimers; add your own idiotic contribution below!

More deep background to Idiots from China Global Television Network:

and  more musing on the subject from Deutsche Welle:

and China Global TV:

and the Irish Times:

Irish Times

2 thoughts on “Brexit! Bananas! Baked Beans! Idiots!

  1. Martin

    I don’t, I’m afraid, but if you hum it, I’m sure I’ll pick it up. Does it really scan, though?

    Reply
  2. Sardine M. Hattington

    Did you know that you released this on YT nearly the same time as the new Sparks single?

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *