The Quiet Piggies would like to introduce themselves.


Esmerelda K. Piglet is a big fan of a wide variety of bogus, swine-related diseases, and spends her free time researching humans and then eating them.


Griselda Q. Piglet comes from a long line of swine, and has stood in more queues than she has had hot dinners, which is quite a lot. When not supporting Resident Chump in her role as spokes-swine by calling out the FAKE NEWS, she enjoys nothing more than a good old-fashioned roll around in the dirt. And who can blame her?


Melanoma Z. Piglet had the enormous good fortune to work as a call-pig until she fell, but literally, into the clutches of Resident Chump, who made her a job offer she couldn’t understand as he was speaking in Ze Forein Langwidj. The rest is pork-history.

But now the Quiet Piggies have been silenced by unknown forces and lard. But not for long!